[ That Dimitri figured out how to send an image at all is impressive enough for Sylvain to not make fun of the fact he wrote an Entire Missive along with it. It's not as if he expects anything less, but every now and then he does like to entertain the idea that his dear, dear friends might one day learn to like... chill. ]
its a good idea, but ill admit, im a little surprised you would ask for a house and not something a little more... you know. [ Dramatic... castle-y... hmm. ] serious.
[ Somehow, imagining Dimitri living in commoner housing is as hilarious as it is wholesome. He deserves to have a cozy place to live among friends, whether it can be useful later on or not! ]
and one with room for plenty, too... dimitri, dont tell me you found a girl you want to settle down with already!
[Sylvain is lucky that Dimitri didn't send a full-fledged Letter. It could have been much worse, but texting is still a chore, and therefore his old friend is saved from such a fate.]
Did you think I might ask for a fortress? [Or a castle. Honestly, did the thought cross his mind? He will not say.] Would they be so generous. I was surprised to have earned what I did receive.
And no, Sylvain. I know you tease, but I have not. This space is for all of us, as I said, not so that I might tow strange women back with me from the streets of Kyst.
[ Dimitri is 23 going on 97. If he ever sends a single 'lol' Sylvain's just gonna assume someone stole his compass. ]
honestly? a fort would have been my second guess.
i meant it though, when i said it was a good idea! im going to stick around the court a while longer myself, [ --you know, to keep an eye on things, obviously-- ] but if anything does go wrong while were here, itd be best to have a safe place we can all get to.
but you know, if you ever want me to introduce you to someone, you need only say the word! i bet i can think of a few who would be really into the whole eyepatch look.
[ Nevermind the implication that Sylvain has already gotten to know enough locals to offer in the few months they've been here... even if it is a joke!! ...Probably! ]
[Someone needs to teach him “lol” in the first place. He would probably use it unironically in a formal letter, let’s be real.]
Of course. I do not expect anyone to drop their things and come running. But as long as you know it is available to you, any time that you need it, then I am satisfied.
[You know, he almost doesn’t even reply to that last line. He really shouldn’t. But at the same time, Dimitri never learns.]
Do not tell me you have gotten to know that many locals, and their preferences, so quickly? [He just straight-up makes the implication a question.]
[ Dimitri learns full-blown texting lingo and writes a physical letter using u and bc and lol... he signs it off with 'pls advise xoxo' and the fabric of reality instantly begins to unravel--but!! Oh, Dimitri... He's so easy to tease, Sylvain almost feels bad. ]
oh...? am i sensing some interest over there, your highness?
[ Disclaimer: 'interest' and 'want of violence against his person' happen to be strikingly similar vibes. Also, it's just fun to mess with him. ]
now, id hate to suggest im as popular as you seem to think, but what can i say? the people here have been pretty welcoming!
and trust me. when it comes to figuring out what people do or dont like, im a pretty quick study. [ ;) ]
[Why are you hypothesizing this nightmare scenario. Do any of his friends or allies ever want to experience this in their lifetime? The answer is likely no. Do not tempt fate, Sylvain.]
You are sensing wrong. I am not interested. I refuse to find myself in a situation similar as to what happened back home.
And I cannot decide if it is comforting or worrisome that some things to do not change, Sylvain, even when we are worlds away from Fódlan.
keep it in mind at least! one bad date is nothing. as long as you dont try to be funny, i think you could really nail it next time. [ Is this a pun... ]
but is it so surprising? id hate to change how everyone thinks of me just because we're somewhere new.
i mean hey, mercedes might know how to cool off, but you, felix, and ingrid are all still the same old sticks in the mud! what would you guys do without me here to liven things up every now and then?
[ Oof!! Talk about a double hit. How do you explain to your Chronically Serious friend that their sense of humor is its own type of humor in and of itself...?
(In other words: Sylvain's gonna take that moment in-between messages to count his blessings that this conversation is through text, because if it weren't, he's not sure he'd be able to NOT laugh.) ]
actually, im not sure the difference is so simple...
or if its just me, for that matter...
but hey, we each have our own strengths! this one just... probably isnt one of yours. [ Probably...! ]
The message comes with a minute or two delay. Maybe five. You have to give him a moment to think up of something!
Because he's deciding to take a page out of Alois' book. Terrible jokes (and he is quite aware they're terrible, thank you) are hilarious because they are so bad, aren't they? It's humor and self-awareness rolled into one.]
Did you hear about the horse with the negative attitude, Sylvain?
[ A very good thing, that's what. Don't think too hard, Dimitri, he'd hate to see you hurt yourself over this--but still, even after that delay, Sylvain's response comes only a short moment after: ]
no, i did not. but i bet youre gonna tell me.
[ Please tell him. He won't even look away from his compass while he waits. ]
[ It's thoroughly enjoyed!! Just... not by Sylvain, who does laugh, albeit in that fond 'man, how am I friends with someone so ridiculous' kind of way, because he has No Taste. ]
you know, i really think youll have better luck if you just play up the eyepatch.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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its a good idea, but ill admit, im a little surprised you would ask for a house and not something a little more... you know. [ Dramatic... castle-y... hmm. ] serious.
[ Somehow, imagining Dimitri living in commoner housing is as hilarious as it is wholesome. He deserves to have a cozy place to live among friends, whether it can be useful later on or not! ]
and one with room for plenty, too... dimitri, dont tell me you found a girl you want to settle down with already!
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Did you think I might ask for a fortress? [Or a castle. Honestly, did the thought cross his mind? He will not say.] Would they be so generous. I was surprised to have earned what I did receive.
And no, Sylvain. I know you tease, but I have not. This space is for all of us, as I said, not so that I might tow strange women back with me from the streets of Kyst.
[It sounds awkward just typing it!]
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honestly? a fort would have been my second guess.
i meant it though, when i said it was a good idea! im going to stick around the court a while longer myself, [ --you know, to keep an eye on things, obviously-- ] but if anything does go wrong while were here, itd be best to have a safe place we can all get to.
but you know, if you ever want me to introduce you to someone, you need only say the word! i bet i can think of a few who would be really into the whole eyepatch look.
[ Nevermind the implication that Sylvain has already gotten to know enough locals to offer in the few months they've been here... even if it is a joke!! ...Probably! ]
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Of course. I do not expect anyone to drop their things and come running. But as long as you know it is available to you, any time that you need it, then I am satisfied.
[You know, he almost doesn’t even reply to that last line. He really shouldn’t. But at the same time, Dimitri never learns.]
Do not tell me you have gotten to know that many locals, and their preferences, so quickly? [He just straight-up makes the implication a question.]
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oh...? am i sensing some interest over there, your highness?
[ Disclaimer: 'interest' and 'want of violence against his person' happen to be strikingly similar vibes. Also, it's just fun to mess with him. ]
now, id hate to suggest im as popular as you seem to think, but what can i say? the people here have been pretty welcoming!
and trust me. when it comes to figuring out what people do or dont like, im a pretty quick study. [ ;) ]
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You are sensing wrong. I am not interested. I refuse to find myself in a situation similar as to what happened back home.
And I cannot decide if it is comforting or worrisome that some things to do not change, Sylvain, even when we are worlds away from Fódlan.
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keep it in mind at least! one bad date is nothing. as long as you dont try to be funny, i think you could really nail it next time. [ Is this a pun... ]
but is it so surprising? id hate to change how everyone thinks of me just because we're somewhere new.
i mean hey, mercedes might know how to cool off, but you, felix, and ingrid are all still the same old sticks in the mud! what would you guys do without me here to liven things up every now and then?
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[Sarcasm? Actually, no. He earnestly is appreciative of all of his friends’ company in Fellden, even if he should never wish another war upon anyone.]
However, if that was a backhanded compliment directed at my sense of humor, I should have you know that there’s nothing wrong with it.
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have you been working on your jokes, your highness?
because that was actually kind of funny.
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[Wait-- oh. Well it's too late. He's already sent it. A follow-up comes.]
You and I simply have opposing ideas about what is humorous.
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(In other words: Sylvain's gonna take that moment in-between messages to count his blessings that this conversation is through text, because if it weren't, he's not sure he'd be able to NOT laugh.) ]
actually, im not sure the difference is so simple...
or if its just me, for that matter...
but hey, we each have our own strengths! this one just... probably isnt one of yours. [ Probably...! ]
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Again, I do not believe that to be true.
I could tell you a joke right now and I am certain it would make you laugh.
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you know what? maybe youre right! maybe i was a little too harsh.
[ Or maybe he's just a Terrible friend who's having way too much fun with this!! ]
i think ill take that bet, your highness. i could use a good laugh, so lets see what youve got. [ No pressure! ]
god...why
The message comes with a minute or two delay. Maybe five. You have to give him a moment to think up of something!
Because he's deciding to take a page out of Alois' book. Terrible jokes (and he is quite aware they're terrible, thank you) are hilarious because they are so bad, aren't they? It's humor and self-awareness rolled into one.]
Did you hear about the horse with the negative attitude, Sylvain?
I'm crying
no, i did not. but i bet youre gonna tell me.
[ Please tell him. He won't even look away from his compass while he waits. ]
i'll never forgive you
[Enjoy this epitome of dad joke humor.]
The price I'm willing to pay for humor!!
you know, i really think youll have better luck if you just play up the eyepatch.
[ He says this because he cares. ]
but is that price too high
Do not tell me you did not find that even the tiniest bit funny. It is a play on words. "Nay" and "neigh", much like a horse neighs.
[Maybe if he explained it to you!! Because honestly, it's the sort that would have had Dimitri laughing for how utterly cheesy it is.]